WHAT HAPPENS ON SANTA'S LAP - Funny Christmas Shirt & Hoodie

"Apparel for people who say what everyone else is thinking. Bold designs, zero apologies, 100% attitude."

Frequently asked questions

What's your return/exchange policy? Look, we want you to F'n love what you ordered. But since we print each item just for you, we can only take returns on defective stuff or if we messed up the print. Got an issue? Contact us within 30 days and we'll sort it out. Just keep the tags on and don't wear it to a mud wrestling match first. Please contact us to discus a return if you have any other issues.

How do I cancel or modify my order? Orders enter production pretty damn quickly to get your items to you pronto! We move fast around here! If you need to cancel or modify your order, please contact us immediately at support@fookthisshirt.com . We'll do our best to accommodate changes, but once you place your order, production has started, and we may not be able to make modifications.

Do you accept returns on print-on-demand items? Since we make each piece specifically for you, we only accept returns if something's actually wrong - like damaged, defective, or we printed it upside down (hasn't happened yet, knock on wood). Contact us within 30 days of delivery with photos and we'll make it right.

How long do I have to request a return? You have 30 days from the delivery date to request a return for eligible items. For the "oops we messed up" situations, let us know within 7 days so we can fix it fast.

We work with a print on demand company that has print facilities strategically located around the globe. When you place an order, it automatically gets routed to the production facility closest to your shipping address. This means faster delivery for you and less environmental impact from shipping. So where's your shirt made? Depends on where you live - but it's definitely coming from somewhere nearby.

What materials are your products made from? Premium cotton and cotton blends, baby. We're talking soft, durable, and made to last longer than your New Year's resolutions. Specific fabric details are on each product page because we're transparent like that.

Are colors exactly as shown online? We try our best, but your screen might be lying to you. Slight color variations happen because screens are moody and printing is an art, not a science. If you're super picky about a specific shade, ask us first. Or maybe you just don't see your favorite color? We likely have more selections, but just weren't sure if anybody wanted that specific shade of week old ham slices left on the counter.

How do your sizes run? We use standard US sizing, but bodies are weird and wonderful. Check our size chart before you order - it's got all the measurements you need. Just look on any product page on the right side below the color picker. There are 2 size charts there, T-Shirts and Hoodies. Between sizes? Size up. Nobody ever complained about a little extra room.

Are your products pre-shrunk? Yep, they're pre-shrunk. But if you throw them in the dryer on high like you're trying to punish them, all bets are off. Follow the care instructions and you'll be fine.

Can I see more photos of the product? We've loaded up each product page with multiple images because we're not trying to catfish you. Need more? Slide into our DMs (okay, email us) and we'll hook you up.

When will I get my order?

Here's the deal: We make each item just for you (no boring warehouse stock here), so factor in production time plus shipping.

Production: 2-5 business days to print your gear and get it ready to ship

Shipping: 5-7 business days for standard delivery once it ships

Total time: Plan for about 7-12 business days from order to doorstep. Need it faster? We've got expedited shipping options at checkout for when you can't wait.

You'll get a tracking number the second it ships so you can stalk your package like the rest of us.

What are your shipping rates and delivery times? We've got flat-rate shipping across the US because we're not trying to surprise you at checkout. Standard shipping takes 5-7 business days once your gear is made. Need it faster? We've got expedited options at checkout for the impatient among us.

How can I track my order? The second your order ships, you'll get an email with a tracking number. Stalk your package to your heart's content. You can also log into your account and check on it anytime - we won't judge your refresh rate.

What if my order is delayed or lost? Mail carriers/couriers aren't perfect (shocking, we know). If your order is MIA or taking its sweet time, contact us at support@fookthisshirt.com and we'll hunt it down or get you a replacement. We've got your back.

How should I wash and care for my apparel?

Don't be a hero - follow these rules:

Wash cold, inside out (hot water is the enemy)
Mild detergent only
Low heat tumble dry or hang it up
No bleach (seriously, don't)
Don't iron the design unless you want a melted mess
No dry cleaning

Treat it right and it'll last. Treat it like garbage and... well, you know.

Will the design fade or crack over time? Not if you follow the care instructions like a responsible adult. Our printing is top-notch and built to last. But if you wash it in lava and dry it on the surface of the sun, yeah, it might not hold up. Cold water and low heat = happy shirt.

What payment methods do you accept? All the usual suspects: Visa, Mastercard, Amex, Discover, PayPal, Shop Pay, and more. We're not picky as long as it's legit.

Is my payment information secure? Abolutely. We use Shopify Payments with bank-level encryption. Shopify Payments is PCI DSS compliant and uses industry-standard encryption to protect your payment information. We never store your credit card details on our servers. Your credit card info is safer here than in your wallet. We literally can't see it even if we wanted to.

Do you offer discounts or promo codes? Hell yeah. Sign up for our email list and we'll slide you exclusive deals. We also run sales when the mood strikes - follow us on social media so you don't miss out.

Fast Production

Made fresh in 2 - 5 days

Secure Checkout

Shop with Confidence

Easy Returns

30-Day Hassle-Free Returns

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WHAT HAPPENS ON SANTA'S LAP STAYS ON SANTA'S LAP

Size guide T-SHIRTS

Size guide HOODIES

Product Details

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WHAT HAPPENS ON SANTA'S LAP STAYS ON SANTA'S LAP

Size guide T-SHIRTS

Size guide HOODIES

Product Details

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Frequently asked questions

Fast Production

Secure Checkout

Easy Returns